To Torture the Guardians(and Pitch)
by The Critic's Realm
Summary: When the Guardians get a new pet cat, they regret it immediately. This cat knows everyone's weakness and uses them to create pranks. Everyone is trying to survive the Prank war, but only one will become victorious. Come and find out what the Guardians, Pitch, and Pitch's new friend have to go through to live...and it only gets worse when her friend, Gold, enters the picture...
1. Hamburgers

Supere screeched as she was bombarded with exploding bombs. Dust scattered through the atmosphere as she tried to leap out of the way of the incoming attack. The cat cursed when she saw the duo advance toward her. Of all the days, why this one? Couldn't they have chose Monday? Another explosion shook the earth like an earthquake. She was so close to freedom, so close to her volcanic haven that she could taste it. Literally. Fire spasmed in her mouth in vain of getting the horrible taste of sand out of her mouth. But, that took time and time wasn't a luxury Supere could have.

The cat leaped again when the shorter of the two threw a grenade at her flying feet. This time she couldn't avoid the attack. Supere sky-rocketed upward as the simple machine exploded. Spinning in the air, Supere tried to use her flying ability, but failed when something wrapped around her. A rope. The cat was forcefully pulled to the ground. Supere coughed out embers(equvilent to blood)and saw stars. In midsted of those stars, she saw faces looming over her. Supere could only make out black hair, grey skin, and golden eyes and ice-blue hair, red eyes, and pitch black skin. Both were glaring at her with venom glinting in their eyes. If looks could kill, she'd be in a coffin by now...no, make it in Hell due to what she did. She did the most horrible thing.

Though her eyes looked zoned-out, Supere glared back. "What d-do you w-want Pitch(cough)Vulnero*?" "Oh, you know what we want..." hissed Vulnero, adding more venom in his glare.

"GIVE OUR BURGERS BACK YOU FUCKING CAMPFIRE!"

"In your nightmares, pain in the butt."

*Vulnero means pain in Latin


	2. The Song

Supere snickered and got her notebook. She read the number of tallies on the page and closed it. Only one more to go. Floating upwards, the cat looked inside the child's bedroom. He was playing with one of her "masters," Jack Frost. In truth, she owned them. A piece of paper doesn't allow a living thing to be owned, it was only a permission slip to cause havoc in the lives of those who dared to call them pets. The kid Jack was playing with was Jamie; Frost's first believer. Normally, when someone was playing with one of their believers, Supere would leave them alone to play and adventure, but she had a mission, a mission to annoy North. Pawing at the window and meowing got their attention. Jamie walked over and opened the window to let her in.

"Jack, who's this cat? Is it yours?" Supere curled her lips and flattened her ears,"NO, I'm NOT Jack's "pet". My name is Supere Flame Kitty and I'm a free cat!" "Why are you here Super? I thought you hated kids," said an annoyed Jack. "Oh, I still do, I just...have a song for you guys,"Supere smirked evilly,"A great song! I bet you guys will LOVE it!" Jack looked at her skepticly before sighing. "It's another prank, isn't it?" "Yup! All you have to do is learn the song and sing it whenever North's around! Do you take the challenge Sir Jamie and Jack the night? It'll be FUN!" Two uncertain 'yes' came out. Supere immediatly started to download the song in their brains: (This is a parody of Jingle Bells; I don't own Jingle Bells)

"Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle all the way, Santa just ran someone over with his sleigh, Hey! Jingle bells, Jingle bells, Jingle all the way, OMG they're after him now he has to pray Running Away, On a neon pink sleigh, All believers after him, Sorry he can't stay, Ho ho ho! Santa's wearing a pink tutu, Chucking presents at you, Trying to capture you, For posting his tutu on Youtube."

" I've got to admit, it's going to tick off North. Did you teach anyone else it?" asked Jack, amused. "Oh, just about 213,875,024,854,012 kids. That's all."

~LINE BREAK~

"SUPERE FLAME KITTY," screeched North,"YOU ARE IN SO MUCH TROUBLE!" North stormed into the room where Jack, Bunnymund, and Supere were sitting and chatting. The cat looked up at North and smiled innocently," What do you mean North?" "Teaching all my believers YOUR song that mocks ME!" "I didn't do it," said Supere calmly,"You must be mistaken." "Jack got footage of YOU teaching the children that song AND that you taught it to him!" The cat glared at the winter spirit.

"Jack! You Snitch!"

"I guess we hve to change your middle name to Supere BLAME Kitty now, huh?"

"Not Funny!" screeched Supere as she was dragged off to her punishment...

* THIS DISCLAIMER INCLUDES THIS CHAPTER, THE PREVIOUS ONE, AND ALL FUTURE CHAPTERS: I DON'T OWN THE MOVIE THE Rise of the Guardians AND NEVER WILL!*


	3. PINK

Supere looked at her masterpiece; it was freakin' awesome. She smirked at Pitch's gaping mouth. Oh, it was better than awesome, it was Awebulous! Awesome and fabulous. It matched Pitch's taste perfectly. The usual gloomy glow of the his lair had turned into a bright light for all to see. The Boogeyman swore he could hear the moon chuckling at him. "What. Is. This?"growled the Nightmare King as he glowered at the cat. "Oh, just some redecorating. I thought the usual 'I'm the Dark Lord' look was too cliche for you, so I brightened up the place!" "Just SOME redecorating?! You PAINTED my WALLS!" Supere flattened her ears against her head; she hated it when people yelled at her. Ah, well. The life of a prankster usually delt with screaming. Screams of rage, shock, and fear. "I know! Don't you just LOVE the color?" purred the cat, amused at the tall man's anger. "NO! I HATE IT!" "Then do you like the lights?" "NO." "The new color of your robes?" "NO." Supere's grin became wider. "The new color of your hair?" "NO!" With that, the Boogeyman chased after her, Supere cackling all the way.

Are you wondering what color Supere changed everything into? It's the Nightmare King's worst nightmare; PINK.


	4. The List

"GIVE MY BOOMERANGS BACK YA PSYCHO!" Supere chuckled insanely as she ran from the Bunny. "In your dreams KANGAROO!" Yeah, she stole-I mean 'borrowed' that little phrase Jack since it irrritated him so much. Weaving through the trees and undergrowth, she kept on showing the boomerangs to irritate him more when he couldn't reach his weapon when it was right in front of him. Growling, he leaped, only to run into a tree. He heard giggling close up to his ear. Lashing out a hand, he grabbed the cat's cape and tugged hard. Glowering into her green eyes, he said," Where are my boomerangs?" "Oh, these?" she held up the boomerangs before popping them with her claws," They're fake. The REAL ones are hidden until you do all of the things on this list." Supere smirked and teleported the list to him. The Pooka read over the list before exclaiming," NO WAY IN HELL!" "Only way you'll get you're 'rangs back," purred Supere, narrowing her eyes in amusement. "FINE. But you're gonna pay for this." "Let the games begin..."

~LINE BREAK~

"Er, Jack?" Jack looked at Bunny in curiosity; he sounded embarrased, a rare emotion Bunny had. "Yeah Kangaroo?" "I...um...sorta..." "Sorta what?" "Iloveyou!" "Wha?" Bunny swallowed back a growl," I. Love. You." Jack recoiled in shock and amazement. Bunny...loved him? "Supere made you say this, didn't she?" Oh, how Bunny LONGED to say yes, but if he said it, bye bye boomerangs. "No." he chocked out before tapping his foot twice and hopping into his hole. Jack looked after him, a bewildered look on his face...

~LINE BREAK~

"Hey North! I've got something to tell you!" shouted Bunny into the workshop. This was going to lower his ego drasticly. "Oh, hallo Aster! What did you want to say to me?" The Pooka cursed the cat in as many languages possible; she was so going down for this. "I just wanted to say..."Bunny gritted his teeth," Christmas is better than Easter..." North stood there for a moment before crowing," Hah! Did everyone hear that? Bunny admitted that Christmas is better than Easter!" Bunny growled and went through the hole again.

~LINE BREAK~

Bunny went to the room where Supere said where she would be and of course she was there. Downloading footage of what he had said on Youtube. "I thought we had a deal!" exclaimed a shocked and angered Pooka. Supere smirked. "Yeah, we did; the deal was that if you did all of the things on the list, I would give back the weapons. They're in the Warren. I never said anything about videotaping."

"Plus, now you're a hit on Youtube!"

~END~


	5. Teddys Are EVIL

Pitch, the being of Fear, was scared. No, terrified. Tha thought disgusted him, but he couldn't deny the truth. He was scared, vunerable. He hated it. A lot. Pitch would've blamed Vulnero, but he was under house arrest from attacking Supere after she stole his burger. Sometimes, the Nightmare was worried about his mental health, but not right now. He hadn't felt so cold and scared since his defeat. It didn't help that he was cornered by this beast, this monster of a problem. He glared at the bringer of the pain. Pitch would've thrown himself at his opponent if it weren't for two things: 1) The thing was so revolting, he didn't even want to touch it 2) ...

"I didn't know you cuddled in your sleep," grinned Supere, trying not to laugh. "SHUT UP!" screeched the Boogeyman, diving under the covers in vain to get away from the bringer.

The pink teddy bear that had been implanted in his arms.

~END~

Me: It used to be Vulnero who got tormented by Supere...but this seemed more ironic! :P Pleez review! I know you're watching and I want your advice and ideas! *gives puppy eyes*


	6. Trucks That are Blue

"What happend to the presents?!" screeched North, looking around wildly at the new colors of the newly made gifts. Blue. Blue blue blue blue blue! All of the toy trucks were blue! Not red! 15 hours of painting made these trucks red and it only took 5 seconds to turn them all blue. "Who did this?!" He heard snickering above him. Looking up, he saw Jack and Supere holding two buckets of paint. "Oops," said the cat as she tipped over her bucket on North's head. Blue paint started to dry all around him. The Russian glared up at them, preparing to grab his swords and give them a haircut, but before he could do that, Supere swiped his swords and gave one to the winter spirit. They both sprinted in opposite directions, trying to get North confused. He wasn't. He rushed after Supere in a fury that would make the fiestiest tiger cringe. But not this cat. This cat wanted to anger and annoy people, make them chase after her, wanting revenge.

Supere cackled as North lunged for her.

~END~


	7. Googies and Paint

Bunny looked in shock at his Googies; all of them had writing on them. And a pawprint. You know who imprinted his defenders now. Giggling was apparently coming from one of the Googies. A smirking Supere jumped from behind them and pawprinted the Pooka with yellow paint on her paws. Her grin got bigger as she realized that the paint left a giant yellow splotch on his fur. "What did you do,"exclaimed Bunnymund who was rushing to a nearby river,"This paint is PERMANENT!" "Uh...oops?" He frowned darkly. "Run." She laughed nervously and zoomed off toward North's Workshop. She was going to die again. With an astonishing speed, Bunny jogged after her, only a foot away and not even running. Yup, she was going to die.

~END~


	8. Teeth That Reek

Supere grinned and let soot cover her teeth from her enternal flame. Her pearly white teeth was covered completely black. Resisting the urge to lick her lips due to the foul taste, she paced to the mirror and smiled. 'Perfect,'she thought as she saw her reflected smile. It was the perfect shade for the prank. Giggling in her mind, she slowly flew toward her destination...

~LINE BREAK~

"Hwey Twooth," said Supere akwardly, trying to not swipe the soot off her teeth. Tooth turned around and saw the cat. The fairy's instincts started to act up, since she was a bird and all and there was a cat in front of her, but she controlled them. Supere was her friend after all. Tooth smiled,"Hi Kitty! What are you doing here?" It was strange to see the cat anywhere but North's Workshop since she had an unlimited amount of food and entertainment; when she was anywhere else, that usually meant she was up to mischeif. Tooth stood on her guard, but gaped a few seconds later. Supere had grinned. Tooth's second favorite teeth in the world had just become BLACK. Covered in cavities. She fainted, leaving Supere to laugh as she whitened her teeth again by burning off the soot. She flew off.

~LINE BREAK~

Tooth woke up from a horrible nightmare. One about a pure white smile turning black. She looked in front of her and saw a bunch of her fairies hovering around her, all of them chirping anxiously. "Girls, I'm all right; I just had a bad dream." She put her hand to her crown of feathers to massage her aching head and felt something. It was a taped photo. Pulling it off, she dropped it in horror at what she saw.

A photo of blackened teeth that said,'It's not a dream.'


End file.
